You have a choice.

A while back we were asked to photograph something for some long time friends (I'm going to be vague here because they are our friends and we love them). While we were eager to meet their needs as photographers, we could tell that they were less concerned with our work, and more concerned with finding someone to get the job done and hopefully treat it as a "favor" (since, ya know, we're friends).

We love taking photos and we certainly don't mind helping out our friends, we have had a lot of friends give us free stuff over the years. But usually this type of request is accompanied by an admiration and appreciate of our work. Or of high quality photography in general.  But I could tell our friends didn't really care that much. We offered them the service at a minuscule fee, but they even considered that too high.

At this point, I was forced to make a decision. Let's talk about the two biggest factors that played a part.

1. My feelings.

And no, these aren't in the same category as pregnancy hormones. This is not the first time I have felt insulted by someone who undervalued my work and my time. I was a little peeved that they could not be grateful for the wonderful deal we were offering them, and I knew that stemmed from the lack of respect they had for what we do. The emotional part of me wanted to make a statement of defense and recoil my offer to show them how rude they were being.

2. The greater good.

But just because these people are my friends, I couldn't expect them to automatically have an appreciation for photography or an understanding of the work that goes into it. I know that a lot of people who initially have doubts about high end photography are cured in the aftermath. Once they've received their wedding photos the bill seems a lot less important.  I knew that I had an opportunity to convert these people into photography appreciators, for lack of a better term. We could be professionals and show them why we charge what we do.

Now I'm not advocating that you work with anyone who undervalues you just to prove them wrong, you can lose a lot that way. But every situation is different, and sometimes it might be more valuable to overcome what you're feeling in the name of the greater good and your friendships.

Things that drive me crazy on Pinterest.

1. These super common quotes that say...
"First we had each other, then we had you, now we have everything." Way to teach your kids where to put all their hope and security in life.

and

"All you need is love." Because that's crap.

2. Useless money saving tips like "How to make your own dryer sheets, this will save you a ton of money!". Really? Maybe it's been a while but how much are dryer sheets running these days?

3. Photo's of people holding frames in front of themselves or signs in their wedding pictures/professional portraits that say things like "She said yes!". Let your photo speak for itself. We can tell that you are engaged. Why are you holding a frame in your photo? Aren't you going to put it in a frame?

More than a lily.

The last time I blogged was on Valentines Day. Later that day, one of my two bosses (the nice one) came in to tell me that the other (the mean one) had decided to fire me. I hadn't spoken more than a few words to the mean boss in weeks (we work in different cities) so it came as quite a surprise to me, but a pleasant one none the less.

You see, I had actually been praying that God would provide me a way out of this job. It was really stressful for me to work for such a tyrant, so much so that my heart rate jumped anytime I got a text or e-mail from him, I was so worried it would be in ALL CAPS! For the last few months I have been trying to work on loosening the tight grip I have on my plans and circumstances, and to be patient and wait for God's timing. My past has a pattern of making huge decisions based on my emotions and what I think is "right", and I am ready to happily give that burden over to my heavenly Father. I prayed and prayed about leaving this job, but I knew that it wasn't the right time to quit, so I kept waiting. I was relieved when my boss finally let me go.

In the mean time I am applying for other jobs and collecting some money from unemployment and our business to pay my bills. Luckily I don't have too many so my stress is low. I have a lot to do for our business for now and I am keeping plenty busy.

A lot of people (okay, everyone) has asked me what mine and Charlie's plans are. I know what they mean, he is living in Seattle and going to school, I am living with my parents in Shelton, what's our plan?! But the truth is that is also something we're praying about. After we found out we were expecting, we set a wedding date for January. But after talking to our pastor and our counselor about it, they helped us see that we were merely reacting and that we had backed ourselves into a corner and getting married was the only solution. But now we are taking our time, we are going through pre-marital counseling and asking God to prepare our hearts for becoming a family. We are content with answering "We don't know", because we trust that God does know.

I think I needed losing my job to reassure me that God is listening. He is faithful and he does hear the desires of my heart. I can rest in that.

"Consider the ravens: they neither sow nor reap, they have neither storehouse nor barn, and yet God feeds them. 
Of how much more value are you than the birds!
And which of you by being anxious can add a single hour to his span of life? If then you are not able to do as small a thing as that, why are you anxious about the rest?
Consider the lilies, how they grow: they neither toil nor spin, yet I tell you, even Solomon in all his glory was not arrayed like one of these.
But if God so clothes the grass, which is alive in the field today, and tomorrow is thrown into the oven, how much more will he clothe you, O you of little faith!
And do not seek what you are to eat and what you are to drink, nor be worried.
For all the nations of the world seek after these things, and your Father knows that you need them. Instead, seek his kingdom, and these things will be added to you."

Luke 12: 24-31

17/40

A quick update.

I bought maternity clothes yesterday at H&M. I have been feeling so uncomfortable in my clothes the last week or so, it's nice to have some more stretchy stuff. I also had the first stranger approach me to ask if I was pregnant, which is the first time someone who didn't already know was able to tell. Woot.

I eat Subway about everyday of the week, almost everything else upsets my stomach. But this baby loves it's sandwiches. Which is why I'm convinced it's going to be a boy, sandwiches are like Charlie's favorite food.

I had a good three week stretch with no throwing up, but that ended this morning. Happy Valentines Day!

In 15 days we have our ultrasound and will hopefully get to know the sex. We're finally both at the point where we're so excited that we don't even have a preference as to whether it's a boy or girl, it's going to be our baby!

A clean space.

I love Becka's blog. So much so that Charlie likes to tease me a little bit about it. I found it a few years ago and it has probably been the only blog that I have followed closely. Her honesty and unconformity inspires me.

Last week she wrote about how she needed to downsize and simplify her life, which has become a new passion of mine throughout the last year. When I moved home from Canada in September 2010, I left everything in boxes. There were things that were still in boxes from my move to Canada two years prior. I didn't have any furniture that was mine, I just didn't want to go through it all.

But eventually I did, when I moved to Lacey last spring. It was the first time in years I had sorted through my stuff. A lot of things from my childhood and high school. I was very unorganized. Since then I have found it very liberating to periodically clean out the clutter and organize a bit at a time. It's hard because I keep moving, but I don't think there's anything more peaceful (besides a beach in Maui, which I will be writing about in my next post) than knowing everything that you own and having a place where it belongs.

So I will be following Becka on her own Project Downsize and hopefully picking up some tips along the way. I think it's time for another de-clutter of my own anyways. Anyone else going to join?